fiction
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How to Not Write a Novel: The Impostor Chapter
Or, how I quit my job to write a novel I hadn’t started, then quietly returned to that same job three months later [Representative Image generated using AI] In 2012, I did what any delusional person with a vague idea for a novel might do. I walked into my boss’s office and quit my job. Continue reading
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How to Not Write a Novel: Structure Is a Scam
Or, how I confused a literary quote for a plot outline and never recovered [Representative Image generated using AI] When I first started writing the novel (note: it was still called The Novel back then), I did what any self-respecting, under-confident writer does: I collected quotes. Not just any quotes, writer quotes.The kind that sound like truth.The kind Continue reading
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How to Not Write a Novel: The Short Story Spiral
Or, how I wrote 2,000 words, submitted to 18 journals, and got rejected by 17 (the 18th ghosted me) [Representative Image generated using AI] When you’re not writing your novel but still need to prove to yourself (and a few persistent relatives) that you’re a real writer, there’s one thing left to do: submit a Continue reading
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How to Not Write a Novel: The Vibe Is the Plot
Or, how I had a playlist, a Pinterest board, and three fake book covers—but no story [Representative Image generated using AI] Let’s be clear: I never said I was writing a structured novel. I said I was writing a novel. That’s different. And by “writing,” I mean I have a Spotify playlist with 47 songs, all chosen Continue reading
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How to Not Write a Novel: Old Wine, New Bottle
How I Decided to Upcycle My 2008 WIP in the Name of Sustainability (and Shame) [Representative Image generated using AI] Back in 2008, I had a dream.Well, I had a Word doc, a pirated version of Scrivener, and a protagonist who quoted Paulo Coelho unironically, but same difference. It was a different time.Dr. Manmohan Singh Continue reading
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How to Not Write a Novel: The Deleted Years
How I am kinda, sorta back.. [Representative Image generated using AI] Dear gentle reader (that is just me talking to myself, because let’s face it, there are no readers), Presenting: a resurrection and a comeback absolutely nobody asked for. Why did I quit this blog? Who knows. Maybe I thought I was protecting future me Continue reading
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